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And in vegan news…

…yet another dietic study suggests that eating vegan is not only healthy, but healthiER than omni diets.  Plus easier to maintain than counting calories.  Imagine that.  Of course I recommend a firm understanding and commitment to animal rights go with your vegan diet.

Letter from an Israeli member of Checkpoint Watch

Madre received this video letter from an Israeli friend, and she in turn forwarded it to me in response to Archie’s last column.  While Archie & I question the utility of addressing such problems to Mr. Obama (or any ruler), the letter-writer vividly testifies to the violence that occurs daily under the Israeli government’s occupation of Palestine.  This isn’t “really” addressed to Obama, it’s addressed to humanity.

What’s Archie disapproving of now?

Charlotte

Every day, this human goes somewhere, for some purpose, instead of meeting my modest demands for food, shelter, water, and stenographer. When she is present in the apartment in front of her computer, she continues to claim that she has “work” to do and that website updates must wait. To her I must reply, what “work” could possibly take priority over giving the worldwide web notice of the most current objects of my disapproval? She has no response. Of course there is none.  And no excuse.

Snide comments about rabbits neglecting their columns when in fact it is the rabbits’ human caretaker who is neglectful

See above.

Take-out and the teenage personnel who deliver it

It’s bad enough when the humans I live with cook for themselves banging pots and pans around in the kitchen that lies mere feet away from the rabbit pen. Sometimes they also order food, cooked off the premises, to be brought to our door. Why is this objectionable? Aside from the testament to humans’ extreme laziness and wastefulness (how much Styrofoam can do you need? Really?) — which is only to be expected from thoughtless bipeds — the most recent example of this “take-out” phenomenon brought two extremely giggly young women to our apartment threshold. They shrieked (in delight, I assume) upon seeing myself, Betty, and Veronica; and proceeded to invite themselves in to pet us rabbits, further shrieking over our cuteness. We are NOT here for your enjoyment, humans, to be ogled at when your aren’t ogling members of your own species. If the arrangement of our features pleases you, rest assured this is purely coincidental and should NOT be regarded as some kind of invitation to treat us as toys/dolls/conversation pieces.  The next human to do so shall feel my wrath!  And by wrath, I mean teeth.

Israel

How could one mere rabbit disapprove of an entire nation state? Oh, where to begin? I could mention that the very concept of a “homeland” that exists solely for one segment of the earth’s population, chosen by religion and ethnicity and not morally relevant characteristics (like, say, a penchant for not shooting children in the head), is inherently unjust. I could mention that blockading one and half million people in a 7.5mi x 25mi area; refusing to allow regular transport of food, medicine, and fuel into said area; and then firing on outsiders attempting to provide such necessities, is what one might call “terrorism.” If, that is, that term had any actual consistent meaning. So too demolishing homes — with or without warning, with or without the occupants inside. So too refusing pregnant women access to hospitals. So too dropping bombs on a civilian population with nowhere to go except UN refugee camps, which (guess what?) will also have bombs dropped on them. So too agreeing to a ceasefire and continuing to fly bombing missions. Such activities are designed to leave the victims in a state of utter helplessness and uncertainty — a state in which their very lives are continually in jeopardy, through threat of direct violence or the violence that is want of material basics like food or a doctor’s care. What if you didn’t know if you would live through the day? Every day? Would you be, oh, I don’t know, terrified?

Think I’m being too hard on Israel? Think the Israeli government is responding to legitimate threats to “its” people? Think I’m making too much of a few, isolated atrocities? Let me leave you with this fun fact, then you tell me that Israel doesn’t have a long-standing, systemic policy of terrorizing civilians: between 2000 and 2004, 621 children died from small arms’ fire at Israeli checkpoints, in the street, on their way to school, and in their homes in the Gaza strip and the West Bank. Of those, two thirds had wounds in the chest, neck, and head – “the sniper’s wound,” in the words of Dr. Derek Summerfield in the British Medical Journal. 621 children. Shot by trained Israeli soldiers. Famed for their shooting accuracy.

“A Report from Kenya: Parsing a Native Son”

In December 2006, I had the pleasure (privilege?  honor?  misfortune?) to spend some time in Kenya meeting and avoiding eye contact with other writers.  You know…  Kenya!  That country in eastern Africa where Obama’s dad was born.  Lots of folks there were excited about Barack and his prospects of becoming president — way before the U.S. of A. felt the full force of Obamania, and one year before Kenya’s elections brought out the best in ethnic violence.  You know how in the U.S. Obama represents a minority demographic and so his election looks like a great triumph over prejudice and a victory for the little guy/gal?  Similar thing for Kenyans, because Obama’s dad (and hence Barry himself) is a member of the Luo ethnic group, while it’s been the Kikuyu group who have dominated Kenyan politics since independence in 1963.  I wasn’t in a position to be thinking too critically about anything (except maybe my own writing) while I was there, but fortunately there were and are people willing and able to cut through the myths.  This article was written by one of them, in response to Obama’s inauguration.  The writer is a pretty chill guy, to whom I am eternally grateful for hanging out with me even though I am spoiled, white, American, “impossible to engage in conversation,” and perennially “young and confused.”  He cares enough to tell the truth.  I still owe him a drink [and a story I think?], but until one of us makes it across the Atlantic, plugging his work is the best I can do.  Bonus points for the use of “parsing” in the article’s title.

For your listening pleasure

Χάρετε!  In between learning to type polytonic Greek (you may now refer to me as Ἀράχνη — see how good I’m getting!?) and some editing for scholarly-type friends, I’ve been madly writing reviews and new fiction, selections of which will surely end up here on Charlotte’s Website.  For now you can check out my next music review at Feminist Review.  I’ll be back with more cupcakes and some hardcore Archie disapproval soon.  Inshallah the tourists who showed up in DC for the inaugural will be gone by then.

You should also be listening to wvau.org between the hours of 4 and 6pm ETS on Saturday.  That’s all I’m sayin’!

Hot Apple Cider Cupcakes (131)

Terry & Isa call these the “quintessential fall” cupcakes, ’cause they’ve got the apple cider of the title along with apple butter in the batter.  And nothing says Christmas like “quintessential fall.”  That’s Charlotte being sarcastic.  Did you catch it?  I made these for a friend’s nondenominational holiday party a couple weeks ago, partly because there was lots of apple cider hanging out in our fridge, and partly because I didn’t want to break my hot-beverage-turned-cupcake streak.  Like the title suggests, you heat the cider up first with aromatic spices: cloves, cinnamon and allspice.  It’ll make your kitchen smell like Santa’s workshop.  Or the Professor’s lab from Powerpuff Girls.  One of the two.  Either way, it’s good.  The recipe calls for the whole version of these spices, but Isa & Terry include the substitutions for ground spices if you, like me, don’t have whole cinnamon sticks hanging around.

My cakes turned out with a very mild flavor, for all the spices that went into them.  The apple butter gives them a nice springy consistency, but doesn’t pack much of a punch in the flavor department.  Which may be a good thing if you’re baking for sensitive palettes – kids would gobble these up, I bet.  The party guests certainly did, which was nice, since I arrived LATE, and many folks were on their way home and/or stuffed to the gills by then.

I topped these with Super Natural Agave Frosting (149).  Admittedly, I’m inclined to be sanguine about the results of any recipe from VCTOTW, but this frosting went above and beyond my expectations.  You know how you can bite into a regularly-frosted cupcake and feel your gums begin to bleed and your teeth begin to rot out of your skull at that very moment but you don’t care because it tastes so frickin’ amazing?  Yeah, I agree: it’s awesome.  Nothing’s more likely to get me taking another bite.  But sometimes, it pays to lay off the sugar.  No worry with this frosting – it’s ADA approved and diabetic friendly.  Sweetened with agave nectar and thickened with coconut oil and soy milk powder rather than margarine/shortening and confectioner’s sugar, this is the recipe to break out in the middle of holiday cookie season when folks are on permanent sugar high and can’t possibly stomach any more sweets.  I had mild concerns that the coconut oil would give it an overall coconut flavor-which would be super with pineapple cupcakes, but not pineless-apple cupcakes.  Those concerns were unfounded.  You can only taste coconut if you know it’s there and you really try to; mostly you just taste vanilla.  It’s strong vanilla, I might add, so perhaps best paired with cakes that have an equally assertive flavor like Gingerbread (53) or the Chai Latte (109) we met last week.  The consistency is also more like pudding and less like whipped buttercream, but you’ll make do.  I have every confidence in you.

Chai Latte Cupcakes (109)

Imagine your favorite hot beverage. Let the sweet aroma kiss your nostrils. Feel the warmth seeping through the porcelain mug (or paper cup as it may be), soothing your December-numb fingers. Savor the wave of heat washing down your catarrh-stricken throat. Oh, yeah. That’s right. It’s December and you’ve got catarrh. That’s the old-timey version of a scratchy throat and cough. Isn’t that so much more romantical than “scratchy throat and cough”? Like, isn’t dying of consumption way cooler than dying of tuberculosis-ew! who wants to die of tuberculosis?

When you’ve got catarrh, there’s nothing better than your favorite hot beverage. Unless you can get your favorite hot beverage in cupcake form. Then for gosh sakes, get it in cupcake form! Far less danger of spilling and scalding that way.

That’s what this here recipe means to me. On the rare occasions when I visit that flagship of American capitalism, Starbucks, chai lattes with soy milk get me through the ordeal unscathed. Could Isa & Terry encapsulate that very special blend of spices and milky goodness in one of their recipes? Sure they could! Really, it’s all about the spices: cinnamon, ginger, cloves, black pepper, cardamom. All are standards of my kitchen cabinet, except that last one’s the tricky biscuit, or I would have made this recipe a long time since. Finally I found the cardamom in the spice aisle at Yes! Organic Market (yes!), where everything’s in big jars and you measure out how much spice you want yourself, and where I met a fellow shopper who also was after cardamom. We had a lovely chat about how difficult it is to find in most grocery stores. See how cupcakes bring people together? And these weren’t even baked yet!

When I did bake them, they turned out light and spicy, and best of all, they really do taste just like my favorite hot beverage. Terry & Isa suggest going light on the toppings here, dusting with confectioner’s sugar, cocoa powder, cinnamon, and nutmeg. I went a little fancier with some drizzly vanilla icing – the same icing that went on the Pumpkin Chocolate Chippers (126), minus the cinnamon. Either way, these are faboo. Friends and co-workers agreed. So don’t wait for your next bout of catarrh to try ‘em!

Variation: Chocolate Mocha Cupcakes (38)

What does a vegan eat on Thanksgiving? I’ll tell you what a vegan eats on Thanksgiving: cupcakes, and lots of cupcakes. Or at least that’s what this vegan does. There may have been some veggies, pasta, and pizza involved in this year’s extravaganza, but since dessert is the first and last thing I eat on any given day, I don’t always recall what goes on in between. I only recall being full. Very full. And happy. Thankful, even.

Anywhoo, this year the brothers and I fixed Thanksgiving nosh, which included the Tiramisu Cupcakes (119), a family favorite, and this recipe, which Mom had tried before but not Charlotte. It must have worked out well, though, because Little Brother requested an encore. The recipe couldn’t be easier: mix up a batch of Your Basic Chocolate Cupcake (37) and add 2 tbsps of instant coffee to the batter before baking. To top them off, fix the ol’ reliable Vegan Fluffy Buttercream (142) but substitute cold coffee or expresso for the soy milk. I’m a wimp when it comes to caffeine, so I declined the expresso option. Also, we didn’t have any expresso. I used decaf coffee instead.

The cake part of these was Awesome with a capital A. I’m not a fan of coffee as a beverage, but as a flavor in baked goods or soy ice cream, it’s fantastic. Especially paired with chocolate. Mmm. The frosting also would have been Awesome, but I was short of powdered sugar, so had to resort to plan B: make some more myself. Terry & Isa give instructions for this in VCTOTW 9: take granulated sugar, place in blender, whirr around. I think this would have worked out fine, except I didn’t whirr long enough. So my frosting had a grainy texture. Plus, I decided to go all reckless with the coffee adding and eyeball instead of measuring. Rookie mistake, I know, but I did it, and too much liquid ended up in the frosting, the result being runny. And grainy. Boo. It brought the overall score of this recipe down to merely awesome with a lowercase a.

However, the rest of the family ate these up with nary a care. And, uh, I guess I helped a little, too…

Charlotte’s musical review available at feministreview.blogspot.com

Wha…?  Did you read that right?  Was it supposed to be “musical revue”?  ‘Cause that would make a smidgeon of more sense.  Not much more, but a smidgeon.

But no, dear reader, you’ve got it right: I’ve covered a bona fide music EP for the online zine Feminist Review, where women who think they are feminist give their benighted opinion on all and sundry.  This, despite the fact that I’m not qualified to talk about music in any serious way.  But do check it out, it’s a fun site and my review’s only 500 words.

Really, it’s amazing how much stuff people will let you do that you’re not qualified for.  Like teaching classical mythology.  Or ancient Greek.  But shh!  Don’t tell!  Or I’ll be even less employed!